


SmashedPotatoes

by Trans_Sister_Radi0



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: !Cryptid hunter Sasha!, !Sceptical Mikasa!, Cryptids, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-18
Updated: 2017-09-18
Packaged: 2018-12-31 09:04:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,979
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12129108
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Trans_Sister_Radi0/pseuds/Trans_Sister_Radi0
Summary: Sasha has been hunting cryptids for almost her whole life.Mikasa has been exasperated by her for even longer.





	SmashedPotatoes

**Author's Note:**

> It's a day late, but I don't care 'cause I had a Blast writing this!  
> Enjoy~

“Day... I don’t know... like, thirty-six? Yeah! Yeah, it’s day thirty-six: I’ve still found no clear signs of ‘The Beast’ though, from stories I’ve heard from the locals, I’ve managed to piece together what I think it might _be_!” Sasha held up a very well drawn sketch of a strange, hairless, dog-like creature with an over dramatic amount of teeth. “That’s right, bitches, I’m hot on the trail of the elusive chupacabra!”

 

Sasha, or SmashedPotatoes, as her ‘fans’ new her, had been hunting cryptids since she was eleven and had seen what she was convinced was a werewolf. Later, she discovered it had been nothing more than a drunk in a wolf costume. Despite her first ‘hunt’ proving to be unsuccessful, she had never once stopped believing in the supernatural. Though she _did_ have nightmares about Furries.

 

And so, here she was, on a farm in Texas, in the dead of the night, staking out the surrounding farmlands for chupacabras, armed with nothing but a night-vision GoPro and her phone. It was awesome.

 

Maybe hiding in a roadside ditch wasn’t the smartest idea she’d ever had, but it had the best visibility of the coyote den –at least, that’s what the locals were calling it. She, however, was certain her quarry dwelled within.

 

All she had to do was wait. And wait.

 

When the full moon reached her apex in the cloudless sky, the first signs of movement began in the den; two coyotes emerged and were swiftly followed by a quad of bustling pups falling over each other in a pointlessly desperate bid to be closest to their parents.

 

Sasha’s spirits sank slightly (and only slightly) at the mundane, normal events transpiring before her, she’d be right next time. She knew it.

 

Just as she stood to move on to next area of sightings, she noticed a third animal baring its scrawny, hairless body to the night.

 

Sasha froze, staring at the creature. “ _Holy shit!_ ” she barely remembered to whisper, “It’s a fuckin’ Chupacabra! I fuckin’ _knew_ it!” She thrust her fist in the air, screaming under her breath about ‘all them haters eating her ass’.

 

Unfortunately, her enthusiastic antics did not go unnoticed. The chupacabra’s bloodshot eyes zeroed in on her in an instant, her lips pulling back in a fearsome snarl.

 

Sasha’s mood soured immediately. “Would saying ‘good Chupy’ help me outta this one?” she asked the very angry looking beast. ‘Chupy’ took one step forward and Sasha bolted. She did not like the odds of success for baby-talking an urban legend.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Sasha sat in Mikasa’s living room, picking at the bandages littering her arms. “Shit, these are itchy.”

 

“Maybe that’s what you get for climbing a tree _covered_ in poison ivy.”

 

Sasha looked up to see Mikasa standing in the doorway. “I looked through your footage...”

 

Sasha smiled smugly, her arms forgetting their itch and crossing over her chest. “And?”

 

“ _And_ I’m honestly surprised by how fast you can run from an over-protective grandma-coyote with a bad case of mange.”

 

“Mange?!” Sasha was off the couch and in Mikasa’s face before she knew what was happening. “Mikasa, you saw what I saw. Are you seriously telling me that the creature that chased me up a tree and kept me there ‘till dawn was nothing more than an old dog with _mange_?!”

 

Even at their close proximity, Mikasa was impassive as ever. “Yes, I do, because that’s what it was.”

 

Sasha had expected this. It’s what always happened, no matter what; Mikasa would never believe that she’d found what she was looking for. “Why do I even have you review my tapes?” She asked, slumping back onto the couch.

 

“Because Ymir’s scared shitless by this stuff, Historia is just as big a nut as you, and Annie gets nauseous every time she even catches a glimpse of your filming technique – which is... less than steady. Face it, Blouse, I’m the only impartial one. You’re stuck with me.”

 

Sasha huffed. Mikasa’s constant denial of her paranormal claims didn’t seem ‘impartial’ to her.

 

Mikasa sat down beside her, laying a warm hand on her shoulder. “Sash’, you know I wouldn’t normally let you go out there alone, and I’m sorry I wasn’t there this time, but you have to be more careful. By the gods, woman, you got treed by an angry coyote.”

 

Sasha grinned ruefully, “Please! That old bag o’ bones had nothing on ‘Squirrel Tactics’. And you know I’m not upset with you for skipping this hunt. I knew when I left that you were feeling shitty.” She straightened slightly, looking up at Mikasa. “I’m really sorry I didn’t stick around ‘till you felt better, I just got so excited I–”

 

Mikasa put her finger to Sasha’s lips, effectively silencing her and bring a deep blush to her cheeks. “I told you I’d be fine – in fact, I seem to recall being the one who told you to go without me.”

 

Sasha smiled thankfully and hugged Mikasa tightly, reveling in the warmth and clean scent of her friend.

 

After a minute without letting go, she finally snapped back, her face hot enough to melt an iceberg. She coughed into her hand and stood from the couch, making terrible excuses about having to make a grocery run. After all, it wasn’t even a little awkward to say that she needed ‘cheese, or something’.

 

Mikasa smiled as she watched Sasha flounder about dairy. “Sasha,” she said as Sasha was just making it out the door, “Squirrel tactics? Just promise me you’ll never turn that into a division.” At the look of confusion sent her way, Mikasa snickered, “I don’t want to have to join the S.T.D.” The door slamming shut was the only response she needed.

 

 

* * *

 

 

“You know what, Mikasa? I don’t think you coming along this time was a very good idea. You look like death warmed over.”

 

They had been on the trail for nearly two weeks and Sasha wasn’t ready to give up and go home. Unfortunately, Mikasa had come down with... something again and Sasha had finally decided to throw in the towel. Mikasa had not.

 

“I’m fine, Sash’, there’s only a _small_ chance I’ll throw up.” Mikasa smiled good-naturedly, but Sasha could tell she really was on the brink of vomiting everywhere – and as they sat in the low branches of a tree (which Mikasa had made sure was Poison-Ivy-free) ‘everywhere’ really did mean _everywhere_. “Now c’mon, we’ve got a giant moth to find.”

 

Sasha rolled her eyes. She knew Mikasa did this on purpose. “Mika’, it’s Moth-man, not a giant moth.”

 

Mikasa groaned and cast her gaze to the horizon. “Well, whatever her name is, it’s getting dark so it should be easier to find her, shouldn’t it?”

 

Sasha looked flabbergasted. “I didn’t think you were _serious_ about the flashlight idea!”

 

Mikasa shrugged, “It’s worth a shot, right? Moth-man’s at least part moth, I’m assuming, and moths love light. So all we have to do is shine the flashlight around and she’ll come to us.”

 

Sasha ignored her and turned her phone to front-camera. “Day thirteen: my... associate still doesn’t seem to grasp the concept of humans being bad at naming things.” She turned to Mikasa, “Just because she’s named ‘Moth-man’ doesn’t mean that she’s part moth. She was probably only named that because white people have the imagination of a dusty brick.”

 

Despite the headache already throbbing behind her eyes, Mikasa couldn’t help but laugh at the cute little pout on Sasha’s lips. “Careful, now all your white viewers are gonna be pissy about you dissing their creativity.”

 

Sasha simply laughed and stuck her tongue out at the camera. “Meh, they can deal with it- ooh look, Mika’! The moon’s coming out!”

 

Beside her, Mikasa started to tremble, “Hey! Look at that!” She covered her mouth with a hand, “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a very urgent date with a bush down there!” With that, she quickly dropped to the forest floor and Sasha winced as she heard Mikasa emptying her stomach onto some unlucky shrub.

 

“Holy shit, Mikasa! Are you okay?” Sasha peered into the undergrowth, but she saw nothing through the darkness.

 

“Yeah... Don’t worry, Sash’, I’m just gonna be down here for a while. You just keep an eye open for the moth!”

 

Sasha wasn’t a huge fan of leaving her friend to be sick in a forest. “You sure?”

 

“Yeah! I’ll be fine...”

 

Sasha sighed; she’d never understand why Mikasa always acted so tough. It wasn’t that difficult to accept help, from time to time.

 

Minutes passed with nothing but Mikasa’s pained groans and insects chirping breaking the boredom creeping into Sasha’s mind. She started flicking the flashlight on and off, undoubtedly pissing off whatever nighttime creatures got caught in the beam.

 

Soon Mikasa’s grunts and whimpers ceased and, judging by the rustling at the bottom of the tree, she was finally empty.

 

Sasha leaned over the branch and shone the light below her. “You good yet, Macho-Mika?” Her breath caught and she fought back a scream; staring back into the light were two pitch black eyes that caught the beam of light and swallowed it, leaving nothing but darkness in its wake.

 

The thing lunged, grabbing her by the wrists and pulling her down onto the hard ground.

 

Sasha gasped as the air left her lungs. She tried yelling for Mikasa, but nothing would come out.

 

The thing quickly tore the flashlight out of her grasp and proceeded to tear it to shreds, plunging the night into utter darkness. Sasha gulped.

 

As the thing turned back to its defenseless prey, the bushes shook and something large and hairy burst our, slamming into it. Sasha covered her face just in time for thick, black blood to splash against her front, sizzling as it slowly evaporated.

 

The beasts tore into each other with reckless abandon, gauging and rending flesh as the hairy one, which Sasha could now faintly discern as lupine, slowly beat the other, winged creature away from her and further into the night.

 

As the light of the full moon emerged from the thick canopy above her head, Sasha slipped into shocked unconsciousness.

 

When she woke, Sasha realized she was back in her hotel room, tucked under the covers of her and Mikasa’s shared bed. Slowly, she turned to look about the room and saw that the covers on Mikasa’s side of the bed were untouched, which meant Mikasa either hadn’t slept, or she had just tidied up after waking. _Know Mikasa_ , Sasha mused, _it could be either_.

 

 _Holy hell_ , she thought, _was all that last night a dream?_ “I’ve got to stop eating sushi before I go to bed.”

 

She sat up and immediately wished she hadn’t; her head felt like it was fit to burst and her vision swam. She felt the back of her head and winced at the bruise there. “Last night was a dream, wasn’t it?”

 

Suddenly, the door opened and a very tired looking Mikasa walked into the room. She smiled upon seeing Sasha and walked over to ruffle her hair, careful not to bump the bruise. “It’s good to see you up. You’ve been out for about thirty hours now.”

 

Sasha’s eyes bulged –not about sleeping for a day and a half. That was common enough- but because she could see the myriad of healing cuts and scrapes covering Mikasa’s toned body. “What the hell happened to you?! You look like you fought the Jersey Devil and lost!”

 

Mikasa averted her eyes and picked at a band-aid on her elbow. “I know, right? Those woods had some serious pricker-bushes...”

 

The full memory of the last night flooded Sasha’s sore mind and her jaw dropped. “Wha- That’s- That’s bullshit! The moon- The wolf- You were sick- You’re a fucking Werewolf!”

 

Mikasa’s eyes widened in disbelief, “...Oops.”

**Author's Note:**

> ...Oops! ;D  
>  Hope you enjoyed!  
> Comments are MOST welcome :)


End file.
